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Showing posts with label heaven. Show all posts
Showing posts with label heaven. Show all posts

School Boy says he went to Heaven and met his dead sister and parents


She told me she was glad to have someone from her family up there'

A boy who almost died from a ruptured appendix has said he met the dead sister he did not know existed.

The extraordinary claims by Colton Burpo, aged four, came after he was misdiagnosed with flu while his family, from Imperial, Nebraska, were on a trip to Colorado. By the time they returned home he was seriously ill and had to undergo emergency surgery twice.

While he was in the operating theatre his parents, Todd and Sonya, prayed, believing they were going to lose their son.

However, Colton soon recovered and then told his astonished parents that he had met the sister his mother had miscarried a year before his own birth.

What made this even more remarkable was his parents had never spoken to him about her.

The youngster said: 'She looked familiar and she started giving me hugs and told me she was glad to have someone from her family up there.

'She doesn't have a name though, she said they never gave her one. But she can't wait for her mom and dad to come to Heaven to meet her.'

He also described to his astonished parents how he had seen them praying.

His 41-year-old father said: 'I'm looking at him in the mirror, and he says that the angels sang to me. I looked and he is just dead serious.'

The child also claimed that he saw his great-grandfather, Pop, who had died more than 30 years before.

However, he didn't recognise Pop from a picture taken shortly before his death but from one of him as a young man.

Colton said that his visions became more vivid as time passed.

He said: 'I remember Jesus, there's streets of gold and a lot of colours. I sat on Jesus' lap and then I just felt safe. God, he is the biggest one in Heaven, he can hold the world in his hands.'

He even claims he saw a glimpse of Armageddon.

When asked the age-old question about what Heaven is like, Colton had a very specific description: 'Well, it’s all the colours of the rainbow, a place of beautiful shades and hues.

'The gates were made of gold and there were pearls on them. It never gets dark. It’s always bright.

'Everyone has wings and can fly except for Jesus, who hovers up and down. Everyone wears a white robe crossed by a sash of different colours and they have lights above their heads.'

Colton even described meeting John the Baptist, though without understanding who he was, having not yet learned about him in Sunday school.

He recalled being introduced to Christ’s cousin and Jesus told him that his cousin had baptised him.

The Burpos have written a book about the experience and Colton, now aged 11, continues to share his stories of Heaven.

Mr Burpo is a garage-door salesman who volunteers as a school wrestling coach and local fireman.

He is also pastor of the Crossroads Wesleyan Church in Imperial and many wonder how much their religious home life may have influenced his son.

His schoolteacher wife Sonja, initially had their doubts about their son’s vivid post-operative recollections but her husband insists: 'I am convinced he was in Heaven.'

Colton is like any other 11-year-old, he likes music, wrestles and prays to the god he describes as being able to hold the world in his hands.

Publishing the book was not something Colton intended to do, but he said he again turned to God for an answer.

He prayed: 'God, if this is really you. I don't know how to publish a book. If you want me to do this you will have the publishing industry come to me.'

And they did. So far half a million books have been printed.

Book stores across the country are trying to get more copies. They are on e-book readers, audio tape and there is even talk of a movie.

Mr Burpo said: 'I don't know why He picked us. God did a remarkable miracle for us.'

Martyrdom = Seventy Two Virgins = Freaking Nightmare


Now, I keep hearing that the reason all of these Jihadists are so inclined on blowing themselves up is for God's ultimate reward of 72 Virgins. Now if Muslims actually believed this, there would be (a hell of a lot) more than the 40 or so suicide bombers in a year...for the love of God, there are over a Billion Muslims. 

These remarkably short life spanned chaps do it, because they are unhinged, they are morons and figure if they are going to kill themselves, they may as well get some credit for it....and say God said it was OK, so they're peeps can be proud of them and tell everyone there is a 'Welcome to Heaven' halo on their heads. Needless to say, their mental faculties are compromised (or mis-wired). But this whole concept brought a new line of questioning to my mind....

Q1. Who is the complete cluster fucking idiot who thought that seventy two virgins? 

It's from an unreliable guy, who heard it from a guy, who heard from a guy, who claimed that the Prophet said it, completely unverified and the guy has a spotty record/memory. A bunch of the sayings he attributed to Prophet Muhammad have already been disproved.....including this one.  

Q2. How did it become the epitome of God's greatest reward? 

If this imbecile is somehow still alive someone ought to take a loaded pistol, shove it up his ass, and keep pulling the trigger (remember to take the safety off!) till you hear the gun click......reload and repeat exercises. If the sewage spewing mind molester is dead, then I'm sure God's got me covered.

I have no idea beyond this. I refuse to conduct research as I believe all knowledge gathering outside of the Quran is a western conspiracy designed to cloud our pure Islamic minds. 

Ever wonder why there are so few Jihadist suicide bombers? It's very simple. It's evolution. Only the most stupid human being would think that it's a blessing to have to live and appease 72 chicks, hence, they are the morons who get to die (preferably before passing on their genes). To prove it, Islam allowed 4 wives. 

Now find me a single suicide bomber who has more than a single wife (that isn't clinically insane.... which would actually explain a lot).

Women are highly complex mind altering creatures, and the truth is that being with just one of them will cause cancer, ulcers, brain hemorrhaging, and that's before your married (if you want proof, check out Bridezillas). Now do yourself a favour and multiply that by the power of 72.  

Every man, with half a brain (or old enough to experience a relationship), has considered this, and has swiftly passed out from the potential trauma (this is why men like taking naps...we have long recovery periods). It's a completely stupid idea. 

Can imagine all the girl drama? Typical groups of girls (5-6) are bad enough, but I can't imagine what 72 virgins will do to a man psyche. Chatter, Chatter, Chatter....and you'll be the one 'impartial' mediator....Good Luck playing Daddy and Husband with the same horde of women all day (If your into that sort of thing, I doubt your in Gods goods books anyway). 

How do you explain how you love them all equally....to 72 women!!! Be careful or they'll string you up and tear you open like a pinata, although that's what you deserve for wanting such a ludicrous thing.  

Since women are the ones with the power in any relationship (it's a fact, check wikipedia), they are the ones who get to decide who gets the lucky martyr for the night....and how exactly do they do that amicably? Rock Paper Scissors? 

Forget friendly pillow fights, think more Jail house brawls. That's a dangerous collection of estrogen (a Class A felony drug if there was any), and your the only guy, but the end of your first week you'll be looking into Sex Change operations. 

Whilst one may currently be praying for 72 Virgins now, once you get them, you'll be praying for Viagra....not to mention a shot gun to blow your own brains out. 

Q3. Is this Logical?

My Logic is impeccable, if you don't believe me, check out my formula.

Step 1. Martyrdom = Seventy Two Virgins = Freaking Nightmare

Step 2. Martyrdom = Something only a Moron who hates his life pursues

Step 3. Something only a Moron who hates his life pursues = Seventy Two Virgins

The Big Idea

Life is hard, living the life of a good person (let alone Muslim) is hard. 
The truth is that we all, in some way or the other, come short.
To kill yourself and others in the name of religion is a cop out, and one that God isn't likely to fall for.
Instead, why don't you (Cluster Fucking) Martyrs, try Living for Islam and bettering the world around you.
Even if you fail, at least you won't harm anyone and hey, you might do some Actual Good.